The Joys and Challenges of Group Gifting

Have you ever received the same gift on the same occasion from multiple people?

Well, I certainly have!

You can call me the “gift bath set person” — I’m now fortunate to own an impressive collection of identical body care products. While it’s heartwarming to know that my family and friends care, the redundancy can be quite overwhelming.

However, last year was different. It was my milestone birthday, and instead of ending up with a mountain of bath sets or duplicates like several bottles of wine that have barely seen the corkscrew, my clever cronies and family chose to embrace group gifting. Let me tell you, it truly made a difference.

The Benefits of Group Gifting

As a recipient, the advantages of group gifting are significant — if the gift is right. It could be an opportunity to indulge in that dream vacation that would have taken years to save for, or that particularly dazzling artisanal jewellery piece that felt like a far-fetched fantasy.

We’re all familiar with group gifting for major events like weddings — like contributing towards the couple’s honeymoon to the most fabulous destination or a high-end appliance. In the context of a baby shower, it might involve procuring the long-desired pram fit for a prince or princess, or for someone leaving a company or retiring (not the wristwatch though — by the way, does anyone know why a wristwatch is given to watch the time in retirement?!). Or sending a fabulous artisanal hamper for the end-of-year Thank You Teacher gifts as a  group gift — after all, who wants their teacher to receive 20 "Best Teacher" mugs or picture frames? Often, these gifts are met with joyful reactions and cherished for years to come.

The crux of all this is that one of the primary advantages of group gifting is the ability to pool resources for something truly special, rather than separate, smaller gifts that may not be needed or used.

Group gifting can also cultivate a sense of community. For instance, during my milestone birthday, the collective effort made me feel incredibly loved and valued. It was a similar experience with a baby shower I co-ordinated. Friends who hadn’t spoken in years reconnected while discussing the gift, rekindling old bonds. It was heartwarming to see that the gift was so much more, it was a symbol of unity and celebration.

The Challenges of Group Gifting

However, group gifting isn’t without its hurdles.

There are logistical labyrinths and the time commitment required for coordination. Who is the brave soul willing to take on the responsibility? Is it a constant role within the friendship, family or work group, or do they rotate the duty?

Often, the responsibility falls on one person who is perceived as good at organising and enjoys the task — collecting funds and purchasing the gift. The downside is that over time, resentment may build. Coordinating contributions can turn into a logistical nightmare. Some people may forget to chip in on time, while others have differing opinions on the gift selection, and a few may not be enthusiastic about the idea from the start. This can lead to headaches for the organiser, who I have known to often end up covering the extra costs until everyone settles up.

Determining individual contributions can also be a rather delicate dance. Some individuals simply have more disposable income than others. The trick is have ground rules established upfront to make sure no one feels pressured to contribute beyond their means, while allowing those who do to give what they can. Additionally, managing expectations from the wealthier or most generous contributors becomes necessary — when it’s their turn, the group may not be able to match their spending power.

I have found the logistics tend to be more straightforward in a work setting, where an envelope is circulated for anonymous contributions, with just names scribbled on the envelope or ticked off to acknowledge participation. Nowadays, much of this task has now shifted to various apps.

In a family and friends context, it’s also crucial to be considerate about how often someone is asked to contribute compared to others. Picture this; if you’re flying solo or a single parent with one child in a gift group with friends and family who have three or four children, you might find yourself contributing disproportionately more frequently than others. This doesn’t necessarily mean that when it comes to your turn, your child or you will receive gifts that reflect your contributions to those larger families. 

This sentiment often holds true in any gifting situation, but the added pressure in a group gifting scenario can be significant. No one should feel pressured to fork over funds; in fact, group gifting can serve as a protective mechanism for those who may be financially strained, allowing them the freedom to contribute as much or as little as they can.

Conclusion

Ultimately, group gifting is a balancing act. Done right, it can lead to memorable and meaningful gifts that stand out. However, it requires a symphony of communication, organisation, and a touch of patience to ensure success. Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end, the experience can be rewarding, bringing people together in a shared celebration or purpose.

Author: Dele Kehn-Alafun

August 2025